Gender Translations

[preach]

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:
40-ish...................................49.
Adventurous..........................Slept with everyone.
Athletic.................................No breasts.
Average looking.....................Moooo.
Beautiful...............................Pathologic al liar.
Emotionally Secure................On medication.
Feminist................................Fat.
Free Spirit.............................Junkie.
Friendship first.......................Former Slut.
New-Age...............................Body hair in the wrong places.
Old-fashioned........................No B.J.'s
Open-minded........................Desperate.
Outgoing...............................Loud and embarrassing.
Professional..........................*****.
Voluptuous...........................Very fat.
Large frame.........................Hugely fat.
Wants soul mate...................Stalker.

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
Yes.....................................No
No......................................Yes
Maybe.................................No
We need...............................I want
I am sorry...........................You'll be sorry
We need to talk....................You're in trouble
Sure, go ahead....................You better not
Do what you want.................You will pay for this later
I am not upset......................Of course, I am upset, you moron!
You're attentive tonight............Is sex all you ever think about?

DICTIONARY FOR DECODING MEN'S ENGLISH:
I am hungry...............................I am hungry
I am sleepy................................I am sleepy
I am tired...................................I am tired
Nice dress...................................Nice cleavage!
I love you...................................Let's have sex now
I am bored..................................Do you want to have sex?
May I have this dance?.................I'd like to have sex with you.
Can I call you sometime?..............I'd like to have sex with you.
Do you want to go to a movie?......I'd like to have sex with you.
Can I take you out to dinner?........I'd like to have sex with you.
I don't think those shoes go with that outfit..............I'm gay

[Bu11dogg2]

Nice dress...................................Nice cleavage!
I love you...................................Let's have sex now
I am bored..................................Do you want to have sex?
May I have this dance?.................I'd like to have sex with you.
Can I call you sometime?..............I'd like to have sex with you.
Do you want to go to a movie?......I'd like to have sex with you.
Can I take you out to dinner?........I'd like to have sex with you


ding ding!

[Murphy2012]

~rotfl~THAT....is absolutely hilarious man....

[mdungelman]

Add this the the list of decoding womens english:

Dude: What's the matter? Why are you so quiet now?
Chick: I'm fine. Its nothing.>Translation> I'm pissed off and I'm gonna let this build up for a while. So put on your helmet and strap on your seat belt!

Stay away from the old-fashioned chicks!

[Nate8409]

Now try explaining that to someone who is not from this country. No means yes? Yes means no? I am happy means I am sad? This shirt is nice means why havn't you bought this for me yet or the double meaning this shirt is for sluts.

The answer is always I don't know.

[Ichigo]

has vlad read this yet? ~bounce~